The Goin' Owens

Transition Stinks (err… is exciting!)

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I need a little help with my ducks tonight…
Remember Yay Duck and Yuck Duck?  A pair-of-ducks….paradox! 
Tonight I’d like to declare that transition is rotten.  It’s no fun.  I want to avoid it.
And, I’m really excited to embark on what is to come.  Transition is full of opportunity. It’s exciting and fulfilling.   
Let me explain…
When I was a little girl, I went to summer camp by myself, starting at age 8.  It was just a week of camp and my cousins and/or friends from church were often there with me.  It was SO MUCH FUN!  But do you know what I did all through the church service the morning before my parents drove me up to camp to be dropped off?  I cried.  I cried through the hymns, I cried through the sermon, I may have even cried through lunch and the two hour drive to camp.
Why?  After all, I just said that camp was SO MUCH FUN!
Because I missed my family.  My Mom. My Dad. My brother.  I missed them so very much, I cried.  Then, after we moved my bags into my cabin and met the rest of my roommates that afternoon, we shared a tearful goodbye and I was at camp.  I often didn’t eat dinner that night, even though they were serving my favorite breaded chicken sandwich!  But, for the rest of that week, I was “all in”.  I did the early morning jog and swim to win extra points for my team, I did the obstacle course, the trust fall, the kayaks at the lake.  I wore the armor of God, brought down the walls of Jericho and even performed in the talent show.  I loved camp!  I especially enjoyed mail call as well as sending postcards home, telling my family about camp.  I missed them a lot, but at the same time, I was having a blast. 
Did you hear that?  Yays and yucks, all mashed together!
We have three weeks till we fly back home to PA for a time.  We’ve shared many goodbyes as other friends have already transitioned back home for leave or forever.  But as my flight quickly approaches, I am beginning to seriously miss my friends here…ahead of time, just like missing my family before camp even started.  Some have been friends our entire three years here, while others are new friends we look forward to getting to know even more.   This Friday will be graduation at EBCoM with even more goodbyes to students who have been here our entire first term. 

It’s tempting to feel quite sad.  (Yuck!)

Then, we’ll board a plane with our two young children and travel (by plane and car) for roughly the next 28 hours or so.  We’ll take them “back home” to where our 6-year-old will vaguely remember his 3-year-old life and where our almost 4-year-old will have no memory besides the pictures we’ve shown and stories we’ve told her.  They’ll be reunited with family who they mainly know through Skype or letters.  They’ll meet many of our friends as strangers.  Then, after 5 months, we’ll travel back to Malawi to the familiar people and places of this “home”.  And as I did before we boarded the plane to come to Malawi, I turn to Jonathan and ask “What on earth are we doing to our children?!?!”

It’s tempting to feel quite desperate, even confused.  (Yuck!)

Transition is hard on kids.  It’s hard enough on adults!  We’ve talked with them for months about visiting PA, going “back home,” playing with cousins, visiting museums, taking ballet lessons, swim lessons, going to libraries and seeing friends.  They get really excited!  They also get really sad, missing their friends in Malawi ahead of time.  They know transition is coming.  Mommy and Daddy are moving things around, talking about what to pack and even what to bring back.  They can tell something is “up” and all is not going to be “normal”.  So they cling to what they hold dear and claim as normal – they cling to Mommy and Daddy.  Mommy and Daddy have long to-do lists and are constantly thinking of more details.  Mommy and Daddy take time to fill up two kids’ leaky buckets. 

Transition is HARD. (Yuck!)

I’m looking forward to store-bought salsa, Campbell’s tomato soup and buy-one-get-one 8 oz. cheese blocks.  I look forward to paying with a debit card.  I am really looking forward to blending in, instead of being pointed at and called “Azungu!” (meaning foreigner or rich person) almost every time I leave my house by foot or car.  I look forward to driving on nice roads where (most) traffic laws are followed, with little to no animal obstacles. 

It’s tempting to get excited! (Yay!)

More than any places or things, though, I look forward to hugging my parents, my nieces, my nephews and their parents.  I can’t wait to soak up their presence over meals, playground visits, happenstance visits and even phone calls!  I look forward to walking into our home church and greeting our church family who commissioned us on this journey and upheld us in prayer, wrote notes, sent cards and packages.  There are moments I can feel myself about to burst!

It’s tempting to feel extremely excited!  (Yay!)

We haven’t seen any of our family (besides my parents’ visit) for three whole years.  Babies have been born we’ve never met. Friends have gotten married AND had babies all in those three years.  Our own youngest who was a baby when we left PA is now a spunky almost 4-year-old.  We are very excited to catch up with everyone and love on one another in person. 

We ARE excited! (Yay!)

In the midst of packing and preparing for home ministry, I have yay ducks and yuck ducks bouncing all over inside, competing for my attention – trying to win me over.  But I’m reminded of the training we received in our last huge transition – when we came to Malawi.

Embrace the paradox – the pair-of-ducks. 

Let the Yays be Yays and celebrate them!   
Let the Yucks be Yucks and grieve them.  
They both deserve their due attention. 
This is a hard thing to do – embrace paradox.
Please pray with us that we can embrace the paradox of this transition.  
Pray not only for preservation of relationships, but for flourishing through the changes we face.
As always, pray that God would be glorified, magnified and honored through the Yays and Yucks. 

He is able.

The 2015 Floods

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As usual, I pulled out the homeschool books for the day and settled into the couch with the kids to do some reading.  It had been raining for a while and the wind was really picking up.  I particularly noticed how stormy it was while I read from a book we had been working through for a couple of weeks.  That morning’s chapter involved a hurricane hitting Palm Beach, FL and how one family prepared for and weathered the storm.  I paused a moment to reassure the children that we were not experiencing a hurricane, although it was very windy and rainy outside (just like in the book) and that we didn’t need to board up our windows to be safe, etc.

Little did I know that it truly was a tropical storm passing over!

The 8x4x2 foot drain at the bottom of our property
filled nearly to the top during the storm.
Water drains from other properties uphill
to collect and drain here.


It started the morning of January 12th, 2015 and continued storming through the 15th – all day, all night.  It was incredible to experience so much constant rain, very heavy at times, accompanied by impressive wind.  We had no idea of the magnitude of the storm at the time (we don’t have live radar and rarely tune into a weather report).  The most immediate results we noticed were lack of power and water.  The massive increase of water in the Shire River resulted in the shutting down of generators to prevent damage to them, which meant drastic power shedding and no running water supplied to most of the city of Blantyre.  For 3 weeks we had very little electricity, ranging from 12-16 hours of the day without power.  We charged up at night and planned meals carefully, using our backup gas burner.  
Carrying containers, in search of water

One can go a good while without electricity (people did for thousands of years, right?!), but no water is devastating.  While driving to town, I saw people lined up outside the house at the end of our road and several other houses further on.  All had empty buckets, awaiting the possibility of water.  Later I learned that the gate where they waited had a borehole (deep well) –  the only local way to access water throughout the shortage.  Although we had been through other water shortages before, this one was wide-spread throughout the city, obviously altering the lives of everyone we knew, rich or poor.   

Catching water from our roof at
any time of day or night (almost),
you catch it when it comes!

Water has since begun reaching many parts of the city again, slowly and unreliably, but there is hope.  Our water is touch and go (now around 4 weeks after the storm), but with collected rain, we are doing okay.  Clean drinking water is the main concern as contamination is a serious threat for many after the floods, particularly in rural flooded areas.  Everyone has been encouraged to treat the water (from the tap or borehole) to condition it for drinking.  Personally, we filter all our drinking and cooking water.  The spread of diseases such as cholera and typhoid are likely in situations where many people are living in camps without a clean water supply.  It is also the peak of malaria season in Malawi. 

As the storm subsided and people took stock of their homes, news began to spread of the vast devastation across the country, particularly in the southern half of Malawi.   In both rural and urban areas where houses are built from mud bricks (sometimes fired, sometimes not) held together by mud or diluted concrete, with or without a foundation, falling walls and houses were inevitable.  The stories shared in news articles are astounding.  Here are some we have found to be helpful in understanding the damage to property and life as a result of the storm:

Malawi Floods: The Long Slog Home

UNICEF Reports

A Malawian Climate Change Specialist’ Perspective 

If you would like to provide flood relief assistance through the BIC Church in Malawi, please write a check to “Brethren in Christ World Missions” and designate it to the “Global Compassion Fund — for Malawi”. Mail to 431 Grantham Rd. Mechanicsburg, PA 17055-5812.  Church leaders are currently assessing how the floods affected BIC churches and will oversee relief efforts as funds are available.


Christmas Greetings 2014

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 We all had a lot of fun one hot, sunny, Sunday afternoon staging this picture to wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy 2015!

By the time the photo was taken, the water in the kiddie pool had reached a lukewarm temperature and half the ice cream in our cups had been eaten or melted, but we got a kick out of demonstrating the difference in the weather we experience here from our home of Pennsylvania!

As you can see, it’s mighty difficult to get everyone truly smiling at the same time, but such is this phase of life!

Although there are differences between our Christmas celebrations in Malawi and PA, there are similarities as well….here are a few…

Walking through the Advent Season

same = Each Sunday approaching Christmas, we light a candle and remember God’s promises and people leading up to Christ’s birth through reading related stories in the Bible.
different = We didn’t use an Advent wreath this year, but lanterns and nativity pieces.

Our Christmas Tree

same = We have one
different = It’s fake 🙁 

Christmas Cookie Baking!

  same = We still make the same paintbrush cookies Becky made, growing up

FOOD

 

same = We eat at Christmas! I make my annual purchase of Philly cream cheese (when it turns up in the store) and freeze it (even though the package says not to) to bring out on Dec 24th to make a favorite German recipe for Christmas called Spiral Fruit Buns.

different = Enjoying LOTS of fresh mangoes (at dirt cheap prices) and pineapples, both just coming into season for Christmas each year.

same = We eat meat at Christmas…

different = It took three chickens to fill my small(!) roaster pan this year.  No 30-pound turkeys (or chickens) here, folks!!!  They were (all) delicious, though 🙂

same = We built gingerbread houses with some friends, amounting to more candy consumed than used for decorating and more icing bag squirting into mouths (when parents aren’t looking) than landed on houses.  All very fun, though!

different = We made them from scratch.  If you’re wondering, it takes 3-4 days to do such a crazy thing:
Day 1 – make dough and chill overnight, at least
Day 2 – bake pieces, let rest
Day 3 – construct houses allowing a few hours between walls and roof installation
Day 4 – DECORATE!!!

I dare say, we may pick up a kit to make next year when we’re in PA!

Celebrating Jesus’ Birth

Still getting lots of mileage out of the Fisher Price nativity set…
notice the dog and man with cell phone babysitting baby Jesus…
I guess some of the pieces didn’t come with the original set 🙂

 same =  At Christmas, we celebrate the birth of Jesus and the hope of our salvation!

different = The weather is hot, we have a LOT of rain, everything is green outside (not white) and we really miss our family back home….BUT none of that can change our reason for celebrating! 

The Trash Man

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The lighting of the Christ candle on Christmas day fills my heart with joy.  Sometimes my heart does a little jump, sometimes I want to sing and sometimes I am simply filled with resolution and contentment at the thought of God’s fulfillment of prophecy and promise to send the Messiah — Jesus — the Light of the world.

“The true light that gives light to every man was coming into the world.”
1 John 1:9

What a hope-filled, joyful message!
Where there is hurt — healing
Where there is suffering — hope
Where there is hunger — satisfaction
Where there is sorrow — joy
Where there is war — peace
Where there is division — fellowship
Where there is brokenness — love
Where there is darkness — light…true Light!

We sing “Joy to the world, the Lord has come, let earth receive her king”….”Go tell it on the mountain…that Jesus Christ is born”…and we are filled with the excitement of letting all people hear the Good News that they, too, may see light in the darkness that surrounds them.

Then, as our family drove home from church on Christmas morning, we saw a man (likely on his way to/from church as well) sifting through our trash can which was placed at the end of our alley for pick-up (it doesn’t always get picked up on schedule, so it remained there). 

What was there to be found in this wretched, reeking container, you ask?

Empty, crushed cartons, meat packaging, scraps of this and that — nothing of use or worth (we know – we give away what is still useful for our housekeeper to sell).

What did he take away?

The plastic grocery bags we had put our trash in – those were still useful.  So, he dumped the trash out into the can and took the bags.

This was a sobering view as we approached our home to continue our Christmas celebration.  Although this man may or may not know of the Good News of Jesus Christ, he still struggles in the darkness of poverty.  Joy and Light have come – Jesus undoubtedly brought them, yet Jesus also dwelt with people in their darkness.  Sometimes he healed them or provided in their time of need, but he always showed the Way to God, the hope of salvation, the eternal healing and restoration from brokenness — the way back to wholeness with God.

Often after witnessing poverty, I am left with more questions than answers or inspiration.

What am I doing to tell others of Jesus?
How can I dwell with others in darkness as Jesus did?
How does Christ want to use me to shine light into the darkness, even when I can’t remove it?
What darkness do I still inhabit?
Where do I need to allow Christ’s Light into my life?

Third Year Reflections: Part 2 Changing Children

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Creative works abound from fun times at the school table.
A second reason I (Becky) haven’t written as much in our second year here is because of our children’s changing ages, stages and needs.  It goes without saying that our kids are 2 years older and much different in many ways than when we first arrived.  Although many of you have a nifty prayer card with a picture of our family on it from when Micah was 3 and Rachel was maybe 4 months old, they are not frozen in time.  Now, Rachel is 3 and Micah is 5.    
  After two years of preschool homeschooling, I’m teaching Micah much more rigorously as he entered Kindergarten this year.  Rachel is proudly in preschool now as well.  It’s pretty crazy balancing their different learning levels, attention spans and need for attention.  Some days it’s super fun, whereas other days are downright miserable, but all in all, I’m delighted in homeschooling and attempt to rise to the challenge daily.   


Phonics “pizza delivery” game.

Many ask me how homeschooling goes with a preschooler and Kindergartener.  It is challenging when one wants to learn and the other just wants to play, but with the help of Pinterest (I never thought I’d say such a thing), I’ve found some activities that help engage and teach both kids on each level at the same time.  The pizza delivery game was a hit!  We delivered pizzas in “The Village of An”, “At”, and “Og”… with road names in each village ending in those letters (Can, Cat, Cog…).  It reviewed numbers, reading, directions, and even phone etiquette!

After reading a story, recreating it with Duplos is a
favorite activity!

I try, with varying success, to engage the kids in everyday chores.  One day, while helping take fresh beans out of their shells, Micah was inspired to plant all the beans with roots already coming out.  Because I had let the bag of beans sit out a few extra days, we found plenty to plant!!!
 

Planting beans with the help of a Duplo tractor scraper…
hey, why not!?!?

After a couple of weeks in yogurt tubs,
these bean plants graduated to the garden!

 Like a little boy in America may aspire to set up shop with a lemonade stand, he plans to sell loads of beans to make money to help feed the family.  (note: it’s nice to be more distant from commercialism, he’s trying to help our family have more money for food rather than buying a toy!).  It’s times like these that I absolutely love homeschooling in Malawi!!!!  He has recently expanded his yogurt tub nursery to include watermelons, peppers and sunflowers…we’ll see if they’re as successful as the bean plants.  Meanwhile, the water has been out all week and watering anything is a challenge…but we have managed!

I am reminded how nice it was to have planning periods (when I taught in public school), not to mention lunch period to myself or with other teachers, but I have appreciated precious times with my children that I will treasure for a long time.  Our excessively inquisitive 5-year-old makes connections between biblical stories/truths and any other subject or storyline we happen to be investigating.  This provides natural teachable moments and immediate application of what he is learning.  It is honestly incredible to watch him process the world as he knows it while discovering new things and fitting them together.


 

Daddy rereads a few chapters of their favorite book
for the second or third time!

Third Year Reflections: Part 1 Less is New

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I (Becky) haven’t written as much on the blog as in our first year here in Malawi.  Now that we’re starting into our 3rdyear here, I’m trying to process why I don’t write as much.  I really enjoy writing, so as I figure out why I haven’t been writing, I’ll write about those things!  Come, process with me…
Just as I’m about to go to bed, the water comes
back…so I fill containers for 30-60 min. instead
Still thankful for water!

First, not as much is new to us anymore, so less stands out to me to write about in everyday living. Driving manual transmission is second nature to me now and getting diesel instead of unleaded at the filling station (not gas station!)…having plenty of water on hand for outages, listening for the water in the pipes in the night hours and staying up that extra hour or so till midnight to fill every bucket and container available – it’s a chore, but I’m thankful for running water in the house at anyhour and will harvest it when it comes!  

 Bathing with very little water (or just not bathing much!) becomes part of the variety in life rather than an Olympic undertaking… grabbing a torch (flashlight) when the lights go out and swiftly moving dinner over to the backup gas camp stove seems like a minor move rather than frantic feat.   That’s not to say some of these things don’t get to me sometimes, they do, but they are smaller hurdles than in our first year.   Day to day life is still often a problem solving activity.

One of the food stores we shop at regularly: Chipiku.
Although much of life is more familiar now, some new things have popped up recently.  For example, a local supermarket just opened an addition which nearly doubled the size of the store.  The vast array of available fruits, veggies, cheeses, yogurt flavors and other dairy items, plus a fresh bakery is quite exciting, not to mention the clean, stylish presentation in a low pressure shopping experience!  As I walked in with the kids for our first glimpse of this new attraction, I met an acquaintance who was almost giddy to go in.  “It’s the small things here, isn’t it?” she remarked.  It’s true, small things like these are actually kind of momentous, depending on the day and your stress coping level at the time.  Even if you don’t buy anything, knowing that you could if you wanted to can help.

So, less lifestyle altering things are new to us, but there always seem to be new relationships.  The expat community is always revolving with some doctors and teachers coming for a year or two, short term missionaries for 6-18 months and people visiting any of the above.  Although we are 5 weeks into the new semester, learning names of new students at EBCoM is still a common activity.  And just when I think nothing much new has happened lately, a new cultural nuance will strike me back into feeling like a beginner again.  It keeps me on my toes, and often my knees.